Looking For Solutions
Looking for solutions is not like shopping for clothes. It’s not about staring at a rack and picking out the color and style we like. Sometimes the solution is something that has never been tried, or looks nothing like we expect it to. It’s a very creative process that works best when we are deeply open to all kinds of possibilities.
Solutions inspire me. When I have the privilege of hearing other people’s stories, it send a shiver down my spine. Consider the following examples of solutions.
I talked to a nurse anesthetist in the United States Army. He has been practicing medicine for over thirty years as a solider and considers himself strong and tough (his words). He suffered a stroke earlier this year and said nothing compared to the pain of sitting at the dinner table in front of his family, unable to feed himself. His solution has been to lean into the discomfort and allow himself to be helped by those he’s always felt it has been his duty to protect.
I talked to a mother of three children. On the evening of her oldest son’s thirteenth birthday, she said instead of feeling pride for the fine person her son is, she experienced deep feelings of shame and regret. For no other reason than the expectations she had placed on herself, she felt as though she had been a “bad mother” and couldn’t silence her own self-critic. That night she realized the torment she was causing herself and rather than hiding from it, for the first time, she began to face her inner critic. She told me she had spent the last six months just “noticing” when her feelings of inadequacy would come up, and she began to gently re-direct those feelings into love for herself, her children, and her spouse. She said with a smile, “I’m healing myself.”
We all have our own challenges and opportunities. It’s what makes our paths unique. And where our path intersects with someone else, sometimes their story can inspire us to find a solution for the path that we’re on. May your path be full of meaning, and may the way ahead be lined with solutions.
